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I’ve been buying Totino’s Crisp Crust Party Pizzas since I was about 15 years old. I remember all I had to do was throw one of those pizzas in the oven and less than 15 minutes later dinner was served. Though I’ve been buying these pizzas for some time now, there are some reviews I must share about those delicious puddles of grease.
Totino’s pizzas has cheese that floats atop a river of grease mixed with rather tasty pizza sauce. I often had to cut into the damn pizza because I end up looking like I’m right in the middle of sacrificially slaughtering a lamb or something. I wait to hear the screaming of the lambs bah-ing in agony- but I digress a little. The pepperonis on the particular pizzas I like to get (Classic Pepperoni Pizza) always seem to be burnt or undercooked when I pull them from the oven. My fire alarm puts in overtime when I decide to pop one of Totino’s pizzas in the oven.
But, alas, after I eat, and my girlfriend walks in the house to see my fingers, the table, and in some cases, my hair practically covered in a mixture of pizza sauce and grease, and asks me if I need to turn myself in to the nearest mental ward, I wash the oil build-up from my face, clean off my hands and I’m the happiest Totino’s slaughterer in the world.
Until the next post, much love, peace, and medicated hair grease!
- Thierry
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